mixtape maestro (2.0)

Still obsessed with kick-starting a solo career that no one really cares to hear, head Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger‘s latest singular career move sees her popping up on the “official” remix to Pitbull‘s party rap, infidelity-anthem “Hotel Room Service”…because what we all really needed was a verse-long female perspective on a song in which Pitbull gleefully explains where on his multiple sex partners’ bodies he would like to plant his “egg whites”.

Pitbull is nice enough to keep this new uni-sex version clean though, penning up a brand new, far less titillating verse where all that ejaculation talk is omitted. But Nicole’s breathless contribution in which she mostly focuses on the perks of the room (“Penthouse, top-floor/ Suite, presidential/ Overlook the whole city/ Standing from my window”) feels like a waste of opportunity.

All that time spent leading the “Blow-Up” Dolls, and she can’t give us at least a smigden of Lil’ Kim, circa ’96, lady raunch? Shame shame, Nicole. If was up to us, we would have completely bypassed her and just hired up one of those cruelly under-appreciated background Dolls she so yearns to distance herself from. They’re so desperate to break out from the shadows that we bet one of them would have brought the nasty stuff this kind of track begs for (complete with expert hoochie ballet choreography for the accompanying video clip).

DL: “Hotel Room Service (Remix)” (alt)

Despite rocking a sick, versatile flow (sometimes he rhymes slow, sometimes he rhymes quick) and consistently dropping hot sixteens, Pitbull is majorly overlooked when it comes to naming the current kings of hip hop. Maybe it’s because most of his singles and guest spots favor “booty raps”, but nevertheless, if Pitbull is featured you’re guaranteed something good. On the future club banger “Go Girl”, a previewing of his upcoming Boatlift, the Cuban-American emcee continues to churn out that addictive hip hop candy.

Over an Afro-Rican, Bjork-styled melange of bird whistles, disco pulses, tribal percussion and a sturdy, four-on-the-floor foundation, “Go Girl” rocks a minimalist techno-hop bounce tailor made for Ying Yang Twins debauchery. Never known for being a prude, Pitbull graciously delivers egotistical big-ups (“I party like a rock star/ Look like a movie star/ Fuck like an all-star/ Baby I’m a superstar”) with a paced “SexyBack” flow, coaxing his personal Top 8 of supermodel beauties to his crib for a little orgy fun.

Nasty rap is to Trina what the Bat-Signal is to Bruce Wayne, so when lyrics turn a suggestive slant, she will always be there, ready to prove that girls just wanna have fun too (“Diamond princess/ I make them bust quick”). Along with newcomer Young Boss holding up the mid-section, the three perfect the formula of hooky, party chants with a mature subtext over an intoxicating, poly-rhythmic beat sure to bring out the dance floor freak in anyone.

Though this can’t be heralded for being on the same level of his more lyrically packed material, “Go Girl” is another undeniable Miami rump shaker from the self-dubbed Mr. 305. It’s doesn’t show his skills enough to finally award him the respect he’s overdue, but when the smoke clears and the party has finally come to an end, watch for Pitbull to be one of the few emcees able to retain a considerable career.